Category Archives: Uncategorized

3 things about Quentin Dupieux’s DAAAAAALI!

Daaaaaalí! [2023] 1. A very long hotel corridor. 2. Vile stew. 3. She brings him the telephone. Which is unplugged—the cord isn’t long enough.

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3 things about René Clair’s I MARRIED A WITCH

I Married a Witch [1942] 1. Fireplace lip-sync. 2. Susan Hayward’s resting bitch face. 3. “I Love You Truly” stuck on repeat.

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3 things about Slava Tsukerman’s LIQUID SKY

Liquid Sky [1982] 1. “Cocteau was Cocteau before he did drugs.”2. Shrimp everything.3. Blacklight facepaint.

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3 things about Willard Huyck & Gloria Katz’s MESSIAH OF EVIL

Messiah of Evil [1974] 1. Green bathroom. A mural of faces receding into perspective. 2. Conclave in the Meat Department. 3. She describes her father’s hands.

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3 things about Dario Argento’s DEEP RED

Deep Red [1975] 1. An engineer who plays the piano.2. Stabbing a bird with a knitting needle.3. Behind the wall, a desiccated corpse.

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3 things about Stéphane Lafleur’s VIKING

Viking [2022] 1. Every night she plays a recording of Steven snoring. 2. The waitress brings him a cup of coffee with two sugar cubes. 3. A replica of the Mars lander made out of a metal garage can.

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3 things about Josh Greenbaum’s WILL & HARPER

Will & Harper [2024] 1. “Can we call this a blizzard now?” 2. Jazzy but also country. Upbeat but it should also make you shed a tear. 3. A former manager for Bette Midler and Air Supply.

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3 things about Julio Torres’s PROBLEMISTA

Problemista [2023] 1. Take off the pants, take off the backpack. 2. Uncooperative Slinky. 3. She accurately points out his own insistence on complication.

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3 things about Frank Perry’s LAST SUMMER

Last Summer [1969] 1. Truth serum. 2. Swedish movie. 3. Hotter in the forest. Devastating. The ways in which it constantly flips between being “dated” and chillingly timely are enough to give you whiplash. (Until this lost masterpiece gets a … Continue reading

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3 things about Disney’s THE BLACK CAULDRON

The Black Cauldron [1985] 1. Busty serving wench. 2. He preemptively chokes himself. 3. Skeleton army sinking back to death.

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