Naqoyqatsi [2002]
1. Rosy-cheeked Reagan.
2. Soldier circle loop.
3. Cardiogram fencing match.
Naqoyqatsi [2002]
1. Rosy-cheeked Reagan.
2. Soldier circle loop.
3. Cardiogram fencing match.

I’m thrilled to announce my new film project!
Crust Fund Pizza slings alley pizzas for the benefit of the people who make Chicago a better place to live.
John Carruthers started the project in August 2020. Once a month, he makes tavern-style thin crust pies in his home kitchen and auctions them off for charity. High bidders are given the address of the alley behind his house to collect their pizza. Benefiting local nonprofits such as The Illinois Coalition for Immigrant and Refugee Rights, Pilsen Food Pantry, and Greater Chicago Legal Clinic, to date Crust Fund Pizza has raised more than $115,000–fueled by word of mouth, social media FOMO, and Chicagoans’ obsession with all things pizza. John and the CFP project have been profiled by CBS News, Block Club Chicago, The Kelly Clarkson Show, and many other outlets.
My cinema vérité documentary short follows John’s process for the January 2026 drop, from mixing the dough and crafting the pizzas to shuttling them out to the picnic table in his garage where hungry diners sample their slices, complete with gratis cans of Old Style.
Will a dangerous cold snap, with wind chills plunging to 15 below zero, deter folks from venturing out? Back this project to find out! And if ya like pizza we’ve got some really cool rewards when you support the project—including your very own custom-made Crust Fund Pizza by Carruthers himself!
Where Eagles Dare [1968]
1. Ice axe in the bicep.
2. Clint says “We’ve got company” twice
3. The traitor is offered an alternate way out.
Powaqqatsi [1988]
1. Ropes across foreheads.
2. Bathing in the street using a fire hydrant.
3. Girl driving the donkey cart, sitting alongside an incapacitated (?) adult.
The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad! [1988]
1. “By the way, I faked every orgasm.”
2. Extra tinkles.
3. Manhandling her up the stairs.
The Story of Temple Drake [1933]
1. The judge removes a bottle of whiskey from his desk and pours two drinks, one for himself and one for his future son-in-law. During Prohibition.
2. Post-rape catatonia.
3. “Be proud of her. I am!”
Hundreds of Beavers [2022]
1. A heart filled with adorable maggots.
2. Uninterested gay rabbits.
3. Squeezing water out of the log.
Thelma [2024]
1. His mom announces she needs to cry.
2. Crimping his oxygen tube.
3. Gratuitous trash can explosion.
Father Mother Sister Brother [2025]
1. A secret car out back.
2. Color coordinated.
3. A trove of IDs, both genuine and fake.
Project Hail Mary [2026]
1. Meryl Streep joke.
2. Heavy-handed Beatles, which is in complete contrast to “Sign of the Times.”
3. “Amaze amaze amaze.”