3 things about IF I HAD A MILLION

If I Had a Million [1932]

1. Raspberry.
2. He’ll need to get his hat reblocked.
3. All she wants is to make some biscuits and have a cat.

Directed by Ernst Lubitsch, Norman Taurog, Stephen Roberts, Norman Z. McLeod, James Cruze, William A. Seiter, and H. Bruce Humberstone!

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3 things about Todd Field’s TÁR

Tár [2022]

1. “Haunted.”
2. She holds the girl’s foot until she falls asleep.
3. Number 5 looks back at her through the glass.

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3 things about Douglas Sirk’s ALL I DESIRE

All I Desire [1953]

1. The smoke and gravel in her voice during the opening narration.
2. “You don’t know how unimportant success is until you’ve had it.”
3. He accidentally sweeps his nameplate onto the floor.

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3 things about Norman Jewison’s THE CINCINNATI KID

The Cincinnati Kid [1965]

1. Eddie G’s fabulous purple smoking jacket.
2. He lives on Magazine Street?
3. “A reasonable bet.”

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3 things about David Lynch’s LOST HIGHWAY

Lost Highway [1997]

1. He takes Sheila to the same motel as Alice.
2. “Stick your hand out, chief.”
3. It’s the Mystery Man who administers the kill-shot.

3 other things.

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3 things about Terry Gilliam’s TIME BANDITS

Time Bandits [1981]

1. “Show me … Show me … show me subscriber trunk dialing, I must know everything.”
2. Two water bottles strapped to his chest.
3. Crunchy rat.

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3 things about Andrew Bujalski’s THERE THERE

There There [2022]

1. One half of the bedroom has white walls, the other has green.
2. “She could have been boarding a plane to Pittsburgh, or Heaven, or Alpha Centauri.”
3. Eighteen minutes of instrumental yacht rock.

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3 things about Santiago Mitre’s ARGENTINA, 1985

Argentina, 1985 [2022]

1. On her way to school she bums a cigarette from her father.
2. A tender scene on the balcony–where a sniper could easily take them out.
3. Neronian thumbs-down gesture.

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3 things about Lindsay Anderson’s THIS SPORTING LIFE

This Sporting Life [1963]

1. A great ape on the football field.
2. He gingerly taps his upper lip, gauging the absence of his teeth.
3. A scrum of men’s bodies, heavy breathing.

3 other things.

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3 things about Graham Mason’s INSPECTOR IKE

Inspector Ike [2020]

1. A corpse that slaps.
2. Blanket, milk, turkey leg.
3. “On a scale of one-to-ten–”
“Ten.”
“–with ten meaning guilty–”
“One, I meant one.”

Like my own film, Inspector Ike had the misfortune of being completed during the pandemic, which stymied what should have been a breakout success. On the other hand, during the periods of lockdown, many of us turned to binging “Columbo” as a form of both comfort and entertainment–and now those same viewers are primed to appreciate Inspector Ike‘s flawless homage and sly wit in ways that would have been highly unlikely a few years ago!

If you’re on this film’s wavelength (and I definitely was) settle in for a barrage of hilarious in-jokes, silly gags, and all around good naturedness. Increasingly rare in today’s comedies. The whole cast is 100% committed and locks easily into that 70s groove.

And that chili recipe is solid.

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